I think I have finally comes to terms with not being able to fall pregnant 'naturally'.
Thats right - I have given up.
After everyone telling us to 'give up trying, then it will happen' I thought I could never give up naturally even if our chances are so slim they are out of sight. I always used to get my hopes up at the start of the cycle, always try really hard around O time, and pray like hell in the 2WW for our miracle. Even at every test results appointment I still had that voice in the back of my head saying 'don't worry you are still in with a chance'.
A few IVF topics came up on EB last week that hit home. It made me realise I was one of them, an AC member. But you know what .... I have now finally come to terms with the fact that IVF is our only way. I knew this before but my heart was not in it 100%. I am now. I know this is the steps we must take to try for a child.
We still have a few months to wait but I am not stressing about that. I will try push back the TTC thoughts (as much as I can) until my next FS appointment (most likely June for the standard counsellor session).
I never thought I would say this but for now .... it feels nice to let go.
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